I Survived Christmas Oh-Five

I woke up this morning screaming. One of those blood curdling screams too. The kind that people make to release their frustrations. It was early...like around 5 AM. I wonder what my neighbors thought?

I decided my scream was a result of having survived a very stressful month/holiday. Between work and family I am surprised I did not have a total mental melt down. Let me explain the craziness my life has been the past month.

Shortly after the Thanksgiving holidays, one of my co-workers began planning our work crew's Christmas celebration. She sent out emails asking if and how many people would like to participate in a secret Santa or white elephant (also known as Chinese Christmas) gift exchange. She planned a menu and also decided on what kind of group gift we should give our two bosses. She formed a committee where I and another crew member were involuntarily volunteered to participate. Then she went out on disability.

This left me and the other person to execute her plans. It was decided that not only would we celebrate the upcoming December holidays but also all the December birthdays as well. A deadline was given as to when each crew member that wanted to participate in a group gift to the bosses needed to have their money turned in (which happened to fall on the Monday after payday). These decisions were made by the other co-worker and the one on disability. Then the other member of the party planning committee went out sick.

With all the plans made it was left up to me to execute them. I typed up a list for the "spread" to pass around for everyone to sign up for what items they planned on bringing. I went to each co-worker and shook them down for their group gift money. And I got everyone's money too. I was nicknamed "The Enforcer" and joked that I could be a collector for the Mafia.

I answered any and all questions in regards to the plans and details of the upcoming festivities. And tried my best to keep everything organized and on track while the other two members of the so-called planning committee were away. Also my shift changed from nights to the early mornings, which totally sucked since I am NOT a morning person at all.

In the mean time, I had my own personal holiday preparations to attend to. I had to shop, bake, decorate, send out Christmas cards, and try to make arrangements for my entire family to get together. I wrapped and shipped off gifts to friends. I took care of a sick Oliver. My car was in and out of the shop. I learned I had to work the entire holiday and still make time to celebrate with my family. There was my sister's birthday. The adjustment to my new work hours and decisions to be made in regards to my work and family holiday parties.

I just kept pushing myself. Despite the unappreciative responses and endless compromises. Because I am a glutton for punishment. Or maybe because I continue to live up to this unrealistic expectation of myself to give others the best possible holiday...no matter what the expense to myself.

So when it all ended I guess my body finally snapped. Screamed away all the bottled up frustrations and anger cooped up the past few weeks. But the really sad thing is I will forget all about it next year. And instead of taking this as a learning experience, I will more than likely use it as a reference to push myself harder to do even more next year.

Dear Lord! I need someone to save me from myself.