Passions

I woke up this morning still feeling weak so I called into work. The problem is that I tend to get stir crazy after awhile with no one-on-one human interaction. I mean Oliver is wonderful and all but there is only so much whining and crying I can take from the cat.

So as soon as I got on the internet and began chatting with my fellow QAF fanatics, I tended to interact very passionately about pretty much any subject that was made. Current fanfic stories, future fanfic stories, why they all had the same text coloring and how hard was it to change the coloring so it was easier to follow the damn chat room?!?!?!? (inhales and exhales deeply)

Now there are several subjects that I am VERY passionate about: gay rights, TV shows, movies, music. Eventually one of the subjects mentioned during our chatting was music. Cara, a fellow QAF fanfic writer, mentioned her recent discovery and likings towards Metallica. Seems her boyfriend has been trying to educate her about the band...exposing her to their older music. Even wanting to go so far as to having their theme song be Cliff Burton's solo. She must really love him...But anyway, I digress.

I took a moment (okay several) to express my dislike towards the band that I used to love once upon a time. I explained that I discovered Metallica when the video "One" was first aired on MTV. I took one look at Jason Newsted and I was a goner. I knew nothing of Cliff Burton because before the "One" video I was pop music junkie of sorts. Hey, I could belt out George Michael's "Father Figure"with the best of them!

Anyway from that moment on, I could not get enough of Metallica's music. They were the first concert I ever attended. I was so in awe of the band. I bought every one of their CDs. I devoured the VH1 Behind the Music episode about them. But like so many love affairs, our relationship ended.

The beginning of the end came when Lars started attacking Napster and the fans. Shortly after that, Newsted left the band. I was completely heart broken. Then the trash talking began. It seemed to be one sided, stating how ungrateful and unloyal Jason was. I could not believe it. What happened to my band? Eventually Jason was replaced by some strange looking dude. And he was on the MTV show Icon like he had any hand in the success of the band. WHAT THE FUCK?!

The final nail in the coffin was the release of St. Anger. The first song played on the radio sounded like metal trash cans being smashed together. We waited all this time for that??? I did not buy that CD. And I was very vocal about my disappointment which shocked my friends who knew of my once passionate love of the band.

So tonight, when Cara mentioned Metallica I told her of my old love affair with the band. She asked why I was so bitter towards them now. I informed her that I saw the Some Kind Of Monster documentary a few weeks back on VH1. I found it very informative and very unsettling.

The band has always mentioned Cliff Burton...giving him such credit for the band's success. And I understand that his death was a horrific and unbelievable tragedy, however, he always seems to get more credit for the band's success than Jason ever has. Cliff was with in the band 5 to 6 years. Jason was with the band 15+ years. And not once have I ever heard a miniscule amount of praise towards Jason's contribution to the band like they gave/give Cliff. Jason played on the Black album, not Cliff. Which if memory serves is their most successful album to date.

So as I sat there and watched Some Kind of Monster. I was fine until the last 30 minutes of the documentary. I developed such animosity towards James, found new respect for Kirk and became even more ambivalent towards Lars. James was so dismissive of a band mate that he had toured and supposedly been family with for so many years. Lars was more concerned about control, and Kirk seemed to be struggling trying to keep some sort of harmony and mutual respect for one another in the band. Kirk was the ONLY one that asked about Jason's role in the Icon show, while James acted like Jason did not matter. The publicist responded with "Jason who?"

When they began interviewing new bass players, they kept comparing everyone to Cliff. "No one has ever played those songs so well since Cliff." HELLO?! If Jason was such a suck ass player, why keep him in the band for so long?

The last item to really fuel my anger was the $1 million offer they gave the new guy for just signing with the band. Lars made a quick remark about not wanting to make the same mistake with him like they did with Jason. Then there was a remark about equal footing. So I was not sure if the comment was meant as a recognition of the obvious mistreatment towards Jason, or a statement of how regretful they were to ever have him as a band member.

I ranted and raved for a while explaining my discontent for the band. I explained that as far as I am concerned, Metallica broke up when Jason left. I still listen to their earlier works, however. I reminisce about my first reaction to a certain song, or how I felt the first time I listened to all of a particular CD. But unless Metallica changes their ways, I do not ever see myself loving them again like I once did.

So after my passionate discussing (okay speech - discussion would mean I let someone interact with me), Cara (as well as a several other QAF fanfic writers) learned a little more about me. And I think they ultimately regret ever broaching the subject. HA! But passion is good. And even if my Metallica tirade further confirmed my lunacy for them, I don't regret it. It is good to express one's self...no matter what the outcome.

Unless you are a bigoted homophobe that thinks Beverly Hills Cop 3 was an awesome movie and only straight, white, rich men should rule the world. Then I say, KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT!